Vulnerability Is Sexy
When is the last time you felt vulnerable? Like really, really vulnerable?
I watched a brilliant TED talk by Brene Brown last night on vulnerability and the topic reminded me just how vulnerable I have been in my life and in my business from the start. I have always been the type to wear my heart on my sleeve. I love to share everything. I laugh at myself when I make a mistake, I ask for help when I need it, I am brutally honest about my past, my insecurities, my bad days, and my fears. I truly attribute this level of vulnerability to my success because it allows people feel a connection to me. As I always say, this is a “No Bullshit” zone.
Many of my clients are afraid to share their stories. They are nervous to put their heart out on the line and talk about why they got started doing what they do. And I totally get it. Often times, our pain is what leads us to our passion. Our biggest traumas can lead us to our most brilliant moments of creativity. And that is scary as shit. But if you’re not allowing yourself to be vulnerable to your potential readers, clients, customers, and audience, you are selling yourself short. You are robbing yourself of an authentic connection and you are missing the point of all of this.
Our stories are what bond us. Our stories are what make someone say “I need to work with her. She gets me!” There are hundreds of thousands of entrepreneurs out there. Why do people choose to hire certain ones over others? Because there is something there they can relate to. There is a familiarity. A common bond.
I encourage you to look at your business — whatever that business is — and think about why you do what you do. What inspired you to get started? Really think about it. How has your past shaped you and led you to this moment? What are your dreams for the future? I want you to go deep. I’m not talking about wanting to make a certain amount of money or be home with your kids. That is surface level. Think about why you want those things. Were you a latch-key kid who struggled with insecurity and feeling abandoned and you want to be the complete opposite for your children because you can vividly remember the pain of feeling so alone? Did you go through a traumatic break-up where you questioned every single thing about yourself and felt like you were unworthy of love because your ex called you fat and told you nobody would ever love you again? Maybe that situation led you to become a coach who empowers women to find beauty and strength within themselves through fitness, or makeup, or books, or whatever. See what I’m getting at here?
Vulnerability is sexy. Vulnerability empowers you, and your audience. Vulnerability allows us to truly, deeply connect. And after all, isn’t that what life is all about?